Dear friends,
I recently (October 2022) went to a Women's Leadership Conference (read: 5 day intensive women's circle that was both liberating and emotionally exhausting) where I honed in on my current Core Values. Here they are: Connection, Voice, Service, Integrity, and Self-Care. Back in 2021 I had different core values that included Health, Love, & Family. I feel like I'm getting smarter with my core values to be more inclusive of these specific things. Because when it comes right down to it, don't we all create our own definitions of our core values, anyways?
As we turn to February, a month of love, but also a month of reflecting on black history, I recognize my privileges with a very sharp lens. I understand the inequity of my privilege to focus on self-care....to have that word as a core value, even. But, if I don't practice self-care, how can I show up for my other core values? How can I use my privilege in a way to serve my community with integrity if I don't have a strong connection to my self and my voice?
The WHO's Definition of Self-Care - The Self-Care Federation
Article: Self-Care is not an indulgence - I love this definition that Tami presents in terms of what it is and what it is not - that it is a discipline at the root of it.
My (working) definition of Self-Care: Making choices that balance healthy eating, movement, listening to (and adjusting to) my body's systems, making peace with all of my parts, and choosing joyful activities.
My discipline is to stay true to my core values. Ultimately, acknowledging the threads between mind, body, and spirit to keep me grounded and aligned with my values.
It was recently reported that Marie Kondo has 'kind of given up' on her method of organizing with 3 young children creating chaos in the home. She's choosing to find joy in the chaos. I'm guessing she's got a clear core value of JOY. Isn't finding joy part of self-care? When you can let go of that which does not serve you in the moment, you're practicing a discipline of self-care.
Self-Care Saturday is a theme that a friend of mine recently introduced, and I've embraced it. One Saturday a month I focus on only that ~90% of the day, in my definition. For example, my January self-care Saturday looked like this: meditation, barre, sauna, a hiar cut, rock climbing with my kids, eating clean and focused hydration, reading pages in my book.... not doing the laundry. It's more of an indulgence on this day, but also is an opportunity to return to the basic discipline of self-care - a reminder, if you will... forced no-chores day!
I am curious:
What is your definition of Self-Care?
How is self-care prioritized with your partner?
Is self-care equitable in your home?
Does self-care as a discipline resonate with you?
Does self-care feel like a chore sometimes?
What is your ideal Self-Care Saturday?
What are some decisions you make in a day that you choose you as a way to honor your self, and therefore care for your self?